Photo  from Friends with Benefits (2011)

When I think of the term “Friends With Benefits”, one of my first thoughts is the lovely chemistry between Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake in their 2011 blockbuster Friends with Benefits. The awesome, scandalous relationship they portray is wanted by college students all around the world these days. What we don’t remember is the way the hit movie ends and how the two formed a real relationship.

Friends with benefits. What kind of relationship status is that? You sure don’t see that on Facebook. Searching this on Urban Dictionary will give you a number of definitions, which is why I embedded the link. The most accurate one states “
Two friends who have an [intimate] relationship without being emotionally involved…” Pretty self explanatory, right? Having a friend with benefits can actually be beneficial, but before starting this, you may want to find out what you want first. Studies show that this kind of relationship is for many people, so maybe it will be for you.

When starting a situation like this, you may want to get a feel for the person you are with, even if he or she is your friend. This may mean seeing if they get attached fast, or just want the benefits of this relationship. If you are in it for the true friends with benefits type feel, then the second choose would be great. If you are they type that would like to be in a relationship, then maybe reconsider what you are getting into.

There are many different types of this relationship status. For instance, you could be in the “F w/ B” stage that only happens after a party with one of your cuter friends or you could actually really like the person, but just want the physicality of the relationship. If you are sticking to the traditional friends with benefits, it could really just mean you are friends that enjoy being more than friends, if you know what I mean. It is a sticky situation, due to the fact that life and love is so unpredictable. Usually this person is a friend, so it is not like you need to get to know them like a regular relationship.
Glamour Magazine has 10 Rules of Being Friends with Benefits that should everyone should abide by.

Photo by stickycommic.com

Many different things can happen when you put yourself out there for a “No Strings Attached” kind of thing. One day, you or your intimate other want the same thing, and the next be completely different. I think that is where the main problem of this label stems from. You never truly understand and get to know the other person, therefore, you may like them more than they like you, and your whole plan gets screwed up. Sometimes friends with benefits gets too much to handle for some, and they just want a relationship, but on the other hand, the other person is not ready. If this person is truly your friend, you also have to think about risking the friendship for the frisky. Friends with benefits is easy for some, and hard for the others. It is almost like fast forwarding a relationship, by skipping over the emotional aspect, and jumping right into the physical aspect. It can work, but both people have to willing and decide beforehand that it what both parties want.

There is nothing wrong with friends with benefits. We are in college, and college is a time to find yourself and have fun. No one here is rushing you into marriage or even a serious committed relationship, but you as a college student you need to be aware of what you are getting into. If friends with benefits is your thing, stick to one person and one person only. You are here to have fun, not sleep around.

Click the picture to view the Science of Relationships website

If your friends with benefits scandal doesn’t feel right, do not be afraid to speak up. Sometimes things get crazy, and you just want the friend back. It is normal for two friends to feel that way, therefore, there should be no holding back of feeling. You want to establish that in your “F w/ B”, early, therefore no one gets hurt, and the friendship can still thrive.

Whatever you choose to do, make yourself happy, because that is most important.
Don’t forget to Keep Calm and College On.